Saturday, March 15, 2008

Hannah on Max (weird?)

Hannah Sider, former "It Girl", has officially been upstaged. "Who is Max?" asks Hannah, sipping on a bottle of white wine concealed by an LCBO paper bag. "Dear Max - fuck you" states Hannah. "Are you a Nazi?", asks our interviewer Chris Gama. "No" replies Hanna, obviously lying. New it-boy Max as a leading man? "Fuck no" replies Hannah, slurring her speech. "Max is cool" says Hannah - the sarcasm drips off her words. Hannah retires to the washroom - "typical" replies her PR representative. "How old are you?" asks Gama, upon her return. "16" is the curt response. "I didn't get into architecture" states Hannah, sipping on her bottle - "so fuck you, I'm in fashion". "I am constantly fighting racists at Ryerson" elaborates Sider, "Africans seem to have it in for me - are they even citizens?" Are they indeed, - classic provocation from the volatile Sider. "I love blood diamonds" - it's clear she does, draped in exploitative sparkling eye-candy. "I've gotten down with numerous UN diplomats" concedes Sider - obviously proud. "Diplomats ball" explains Hannah, "what's done is done". "I don't consider Michael Jackson a human-being" blurts out Sider unexpectedly - "I'm blacker than Lady Sovereign". These sorts of outbursts are common. Sider is volatile, her eyes are glassy, her tongue is sharp. Our interviewer struggles to regain his composure. "I have AIDS - but its not like I tell people" states Sider, bravely. "I laugh at legal trouble - its like 'What the fuck?'" She has been indicted in seven provinces and is facing charges in both Nebraska and Wyoming related to her 17 day methamphetimine bender in January. "Hilarious" concludes Sider, finishing her second bottle of shiraz. "Magic Johnson," asks our interview, "or a Michelle Pfieffer's vagina?" "I've fucked both" laughs Sider - she is clearly joking, but whom is the joke upon?

Interview transcribed by Jamie Thomas

1 comment:

highwaisted said...

i love that little hannah